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Dear Diary, 0 theumpire 3 years

Sorry I haven’t made an entry for a while, but Mrs Umpire and I have been away for a few days to the Isle of Wight. I must record in these pages how modern technology completely confounded me in a...

Yes, he was a bit careless, but still a bit of a harsh headline 2 FormerlyAlOPecia 3 years

http://www.wilsonvillespokesman.com/news/2011/March/27/Top.stories/cigarette.causes.wankers.store.blaze/news.aspx...

Royal Wedding FP damn you Newsbiscuit. 0 MADJEZ 3 years

OK great FP, I have just sent my 'Kate Middletons father to pay half' sub off to the scrapyard. I was doing in readyness for Friday., Mine had her father forgetting he'd drunkenly agreed to pay half...

Happy St George's Day. 2 wallster 3 years

Nice to see all the English theme pubs in Dublin decorated with their George Cross Flags and real ale on tap...

Happy Easter to all my reader 2 beau-jolly 3 years

Think I might lock up and go home soon., A group of pasty looking people in anaraks just marched past with a solitary drum and a bloody great cross. Don't tell me the God-botherers are trying to...

Des! 0 rikkor 3 years

I got this message on Facebook today. Help a Friend, Des Custard, Suggest friends for him. I suggested Kim Jong-Il, Rupert Murdoch, Charles Manson and Baroness Thatcher for you. I think you'll...

Trubiscuit - We can't compete with this. 2 MADJEZ 3 years

[url=http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Disabled-Grandmother-Fights-Off-Attack-By-Three-Teenage-Muggers-By-Headbutting-One-Of-Them/Article/201104315976826?lpos=UK_News_Third_Home_Page_Article_Te...

Need help on a potential story 9 Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

Hello peoples. I've just seen that Muslims Against Crusades are seeking permission to protest near Westminster Abbey on the royal wedding day. The English Defence League have warned that if they are...

Its grim oop north! 4 beau-jolly 3 years

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-13159145...

Champions' football trophy run over by bus in Madrid 2 beau-jolly 3 years

Chaotic celebrations after Real Madrid won the Copa del Rey fell a little flat when the prized trophy was dropped from the top of the ceremonial open-top bus., One of the players, Sergio Ramos,...

OK, its last years Easter Card but its the only one I'll send 1 brownpaperreporter 3 years

Especially for Rikkor http://i851.photobucket.com/albums/ab78/brownpaperreporter/easter-card.jpg?t=1303394617...

iPhones track your every move! 6 3 years

[url=http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2011/apr/20/iphone-tracking-prompts-privacy-fears]iKnowwhatyoudidlastsummer[/url] Unbelievable. And I thought 'android' sounded more sinister...

Excellent donkey FP today. 1 Stan Laurel 3 years

Great work VCG and Red...

www.chubbybabes.com? 0 riesler 3 years

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/12918531...

"At Stonehenge, take a f*cking left turn" 6 riesler 3 years

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/8461290/Sat-nav-Prehistoric-man-used-crude-sat-nav.html...

Anonymous Tagging 1 Vertically Challenged Giant 3 years

I thought I read on here recently that we were supposed to be seeing an end to anonymous tagging. Well some joker has been through everything I've posted and tagged it with 'No tags yet'...

Actual URL for an article in the independent 7 fernandomando 3 years

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/utter-PR-fiction-but-people-love-this-shit-so-fuck-it-lets-just-print-it-2269573.html Read the URL carefully...

EU bankers worry about Germany's offer to bail out Austria, Poland and France... 0 deskpilot3 3 years
Pitching for new business 2 Scroat 3 years

I've just been contacting publishing houses for copyediting/proofreading work. One chap came back and said he was publishing a maths book in Japanese. His next projects are a book on Abu Dhabi in...

A worthy FP 1 riesler 3 years

and Red up to his usual high standard. I raise my coffee cup to you all...

Florida. Nice. 7 rikkor 3 years

Just in case you have never been to Florida, but thought it would be a fun, inexpensive vacation:...

What better way to find out that your touch-typing skills aren't too hot? 18 SingingHinny 3 years

Half way through what was (and unfortunately, still is) a terribly interesting day at work, I was researching the typical recovery periods for a fractured foot. ...

Further proof that the world is coming to an end. 8 rikkor 3 years

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/8454002/Puberty-blocker-for-children-considering-sex-change.html Or, at the very least, should be coming to an end. Especially since 15% of girls can...

Arsenal lose 1989 league title to Liverpool 0 eartrumpet 3 years

A dramatic Ray Houghton goal in the 1.151×10^7th minute of injury time gave Liverpool their 18th league championship, bringing their tally to 19, while pushing Arsenal into the runner up position in...

The Wombles are not taking it anymore 0 the coarse whisperer 3 years

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/04/18/article-1378102-0BADCD7100000578-699_634x344.jpg "What the fuck did you say about Mdm Cholet's cake?" I wonder if this could be worked into a story?...

Truebiscuit 0 riesler 3 years

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-13109493 I love the fact that it all unravelled because they told Sven that they couldn't pay the milk bill. Thank God the window cleaner didn't turn up on the same...

Ireland to be repossessed by the ECB 0 brd888 3 years

The Government of Ireland has announced the country is to foreclose. With massive unsustainable debts it seems the only way forward is for the Country to sell up and move to a smaller cheaper...

Man-Knitting. Be confident. Reclaim the art and relive your Scout days. 19 3 years

Something for that key-ring, a lanyard for the penknife. A wrist loop for the torch. Put the kettle on, make a pot, settle down and 'just do it'. The stuff's all on Amazon and can be delivered to...

I made a bread crumb stuffing for haddock tonight. 21 rikkor 3 years

Bread crumbs, lots of butter, more salt than you would think, sauteed onions and garlic (not too much), tarragon, lemon juice (a lot), and something tomato. The tomato can be chopped, tomato paste,...

Chicken comes before egg. 0 OldThingy 3 years

Hence the smirk...