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Obligatory flounce 14 bonjonelson 25 minutes

I've been away for a bit. Did any of you miss me? Did you care? No. And when I'm back I look at the front page and our top stories, and not one single one of them even raised the corners of a smile...

Have they quit doing Writer Of The Month? 3 sydalg 1 hour

It's eight months behind now...

Tickers Stuck Again 7 Titus 1 day

Message to Our Noble Masters: "[i]C'mon, guys - get a grip.[/i]"...

Have I just sold out? 11 Dick Everyman 1 day

I've just boarded a Virgin train to London, sat down in my second class seat and heard an announcement to upgrade to first for £10. I'm now sitting in an empty posh carriage with a nice little table...

Is it me or should we have just left those murdering Arab dictators alone? 3 blacklesbian 1 day

democracy is so overrated...

Child abuse: Public criminalised, incompetent police go scott free 0 Robert Koch 1 day

outrageous disgrace. blood pressure out of control...

what next? Your very own little wind turbine? 6 Loundshay 1 day

[url=http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/pornhub-turns-masturbation-into-energy-in-bid-to-save-the-planet-10075422.html]wonder who invented this?[/url]...

Vote Ed get Barbie? 7 riesler 2 days

http://order-order.com/2015/02/10/bus-crash-labours-patriarchally-patronising-pink-van-slammed/#disqus_thread Crikey, they really don't want to win the election...

Can I just point out that I predicted that Jihadi John would be an IT salesman? 4 ronseal 2 days

http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=86906 Sadly, I never finished the story...

You shouldn't laugh... 12 beau-jolly 2 days

No really you shouldn't but… I heard the other day about a wine trade colleague who is recovering from bowel cancer. At last he felt fit enough to get out and about but fell off a ladder while...

It was me. 3 godly1966 3 days

I have just marked the whole front page ( probably been a bit generous in some cases ) doesn't it look good with some gold stars on it...

Newsbiscuit Evening Virtual Piss-Up 29 Ironduke 3 days

Didn't we talk about doing this once?, I'm sat over by the log fire; Telegraph crossword, pint of Doom Bar, packet of Cheese and Onion, and the pub dog has wandered over to lie on my foot. I've got...

.. 2 cinquecento 5 days
Straight Pride 0 Sinnick 5 days

Are straights losing out ? http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-trending-31639947 And the video - keep the English subtitles (unless you're fluent Portuguese):...

has something happened here? 19 cinquecento 5 days

haven't been around here for months, and it seems a tad quiet - has something happened? starved to death waiting for the ticker to change? deterred by the thought of vengeful homeopathists staging...

True Biscuit. But did she empty them first? 4 beau-jolly 5 days

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2969992/Married-TV-actor-wakes-testicles-STOLEN-drugged-Russian-bar-attractive-blonde-working-organ-traffickers.html?ito=social-facebook...

TrueBiscuit: only in Norfolk 7 Sinnick 6 days

http://www.lynnnews.co.uk/news/local/200-fine-for-man-who-defecated-on-dead-hedgehog-1-3042853...

Party Political Broadcast 1 Titus 6 days

[i]There now follows a party political broadcast on behalf of the Sensible Party.[/i] Good evening. Vote for the Sensible Party! If the Silly Party get in, we will all perish. Thank you for...

Fullscreen Pop-up adverts 2 Sinnick 6 days

Anyone else getting really annoying fullscreen pop-up ads lately, only on NewsBiscuit ? I appreciate that this site needs adverts to pay for the server, etc, but in the last couple of weeks I've had...

So, it's just me, then 3 FlashArry 6 days

. sitting surrounded by half a dozen PC's in bits as I attempt to recover data from my daughters laptop that 'accidentally' got dunked. Again. Ho hum. What have I missed ? Any amazing flounces ?...

Truebiscuit from Down Under 0 sydalg 1 week

http://www.independent.ie/world-news/asia-pacific/paedophile-teacher-immortalised-in-school-memorial-with-the-words-he-touched-us-all-31018048.html...

Football Supreme 0 Titus 1 week

Congratulations on this! http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2015/02/24/christmas-to-be-moved-to-accommodate-qatar-world-cup/ After all, as has been officially announced some time ago: "Football is not a...

The Sting. 0 nickb 1 week

I was going to post a nib about Malcolm Rifkind now having time to perfect his version of The Entertainer for a remake of the Sting. Then I realised this would get the equivalent of blank looks...

'Swan Has Telecoms Problem' - a mate of yours, Kevin? 0 Titus 1 week

http://news.stv.tv/east-central/311508-injured-swan-rescued-from-telephone-cables-on-hamilton-drive-in-edinburgh/...

Great FP today by the NB team 8 throngsman 1 week

As it isn't in the Writer's room (as far as I can see) there's nowhere e3lse to award it stars...

Internet problems today ? 6 Sinnick 1 week

There seems to be a major problem with Norton anti-virus working (or otherwise) with Internet Explorer, [u]worldwide[/u]. It won't start up without crashing, even with no-add-ons etc According to...

JANUARY 20, 2015 NEWS (no thanks to God) 12 LuckyBiscayne 1 week

God is busy, busy. He is like the Secretary of State for the whole world! The decisions He has to make on a minute by minute basis must be staggering, but it's OK, right? He is God! January 20,...

TrueBiscuit - not for the squeamish 8 Oxbridge 1 week

http://sobadsogood.com/2014/11/30/woman-spends-month-knitting-her-vagina-Casey-Jenkins-casting-off-my-womb/#.VOYCwngjQcU.facebook...

The Sunday Smite and the Torygraph 6 Scroat 1 week

Time was, in the mid to late 60s, that The Telegraph was widely applauded as being a source for news. Sheer volume of news, with its own page three which had all the toff scandal stories. At the...

Apps 3 beau-jolly 1 week

Does anyone know what they are? Seriously I am well behind the curve here. I hardly have any apps on my phone but I did buy one this morning (No idea for how much) It's the latest version of Google...