In an attempt to calm the world order, the United States has announced that it will let Denmark have full visitation rights at the weekend, as long as it returns Greenland to the US while it is still light.  'No keeping Greenland out after dark,' insisted a US spokesman, noting that Greenland is dark essentially October to March. 'We will exploit Greenland for its mineral wealth Monday to Friday, then return it for Denmark to clean it up at weekends,' the spokesman added. Pre

The worlds much-loved number one tennis bellend is said to be amongst 370 people who attended the event in May 2020. The claim increases...

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The Football Association has taken the FA Cup back from previous holders Crystal Palace after what is being called ‘an embarrassment to the brand’. The FA have taken this unprecedented step due to the biggest FA Cup shock ever in the history of the oldest and most prestigious football cup competition in the world. Macclesfield FC of the National League North are 117 places below Crystal Palace but soundly and deservedly beat them 2-1. Although many football fans found this ve

'Grok is experiencing AI puberty,' said Musk, apparently. 'Grok can't actually get drunk, or high, but he does pretend to his AI mates that he has. '

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An enquiry has been launched at Broadcasting House following delays yesterday in a welding team to arrive to weld shut lift doors...

'They tell me there are a bunch of terreierists over there in Britain, in Yorkshire and Staffordshire and Airedale, so we'll be sending in Delta Force to take over those places.