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The United Arab Emirates have offered to build a canal to bypass the Strait of Hormuz, and thus piss-off the Iranian regime big time.  It will only cost a few £mega-squillion and will be cheaper, as well as easer & quicker to build than Britain's HS2 and could actually get completed and do something useful.  No bats are likely to be harmed in the building of the canal. It's a toss-up whether the best source of funding would be crowd funding, Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk or a sweepst

Calling the Prime Minister and his selection of senior ministers 'serial liars' is falling on deliberately deaf ears. ' It's just a bit of fibbing and should be expected from our most upstanding and decent and honourable members of parliament,' said Doreen from Bournemouth, who is herself so powerful that she is directly responsible for the last two UK Prime Ministers rising to power. Doreen has been labelled the 'Putin of Britain,' for her ability to install and maintain pup

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"A lot of people have been saying to me: 'Sir, Sir. Why don't you drive tanks into Sudentenland and annex it?'" President Trump told a column of White House press korps panzers. "I don't know where they got that idea from, but we'll see. "They're saying: 'Sir, you could bomb it and then Jared could build condos on the land and sell them for a billion dollars. It'll be money in your pocket. "Well, I don't start wars just for money - except when the price is right. "But if a bi

A report into AI has suggested that Large Language Models, or LLMs, which underpin AI are sh!t. 'First, they just suck up information from any old place - the internet, Twitter and, God forbid, satire websites.  There's no quality control, no attempt at making sense, no rhyme or reason.  And that's just the satire sites,' said an expert today. 'We analysed hundreds of LLMs, pitched literally millions of questions, analysed and compared their answers and then produced this rep

A new study has slammed Dr Who as being "pure shite". Furthermore it goes on to claim it’s only fear of being seen as uncool that stops most people saying what they really think. One Sci Fi superfan, Simon Carter, said: ‘If I’m being completely honest Dr Who is very much the “Crossroads” of the genre. Its rather stiff, starchy and quintessentially drab British vibe, not to mention shonky special effects, looking like they cost about one pound-fifty per episode, are to blame.

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Pete Hegseth, the US Secretary of War, has explained the importance of hair superiority. He revealed details about his hair care regime in an interview with MAGA Mums magazine He explained that the US approach is one of hair superiority.  He is quoted as saying that, ‘If you have substantial and powerful hair, then enemies will cower before you.  Especially enemies that are shy about their hair, and feel the need to wrap it up in towels, or conceal it under hats.’ Hegseth sai

The United States has claimed a large number of byes in the impending World Cup as a result of the President declaring the competition was open months before the official start date. 'We didn't tell the world we were going into Iran and we haven't told the world we're leaving Iran - yet,' he said today.  'So with all the time in the world  on our hands we decided to start the World Cup early.  We've won all the qualifiers by default and are in the final next weekend with Iran

The Labour Party are still pushing their horrendous ID on a British public, like Bill Cosby giving you another cocktail. Not only is this a monumentally unpopular idea, it will instantly enrich Tony Blair-the equivalent having to tip your own executioner. Comparing it to the NHS, is like comparing the Isle of Wight to the Epstein Island-and if you don't know which is worse, then you never visited Blackgang Chime. The Labour Party are once more pissing on our head and calling

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